Emotionally Turning Your Home into a House for Sale

Posted Jul 8, 2008 @ 7:10 pm, Viewed by 127 Visitors, Read 132 Times.

            In the past twenty-four hours, I have met three potential sellers who all told me the same thing. They are in love with their house and don’t want to sell it yet. One person’s spouse was transferring to a new job here in Roseburg, Oregon.  They NEEDED to move…NOW!  This couple still hadn’t talked to a Realtor in their county about listing their house! Yet here they were looking for their new home with desperation in their voices; they needed to find something quick. This sounds a little loopy, but I do understand. It’s your home after all, that loving place where kids and pets gleefully run amok.  That place where you put in lots of sweat equity to make it reflect who you are and what your style is. Oh, that bastion of memories!  OK, now snap out of it! That’s what I feel like saying sometimes. And really, what the person is telling me by just being out wanting to look at homes is that on some subconscious level, they are getting ready to move on. Emotions can be so complex.

        Let’s take a look at the emotional side of buying and selling your home. The purchase of a new home is exciting. That little edgy feeling of taking a risk is titillating for some people. You want to plan for that wonderful future and imagine the perfect dream home. What will we find out there? Will our furniture fit? It has to be better than our last one and on and on. On the other hand, selling a home is scary to some. This is their friend; they feel they have a loving relationship with this house. They have nurtured this home and it has protected them. So often, people will jump ahead of what is the logical thing to do, (list/sell their house first) and start looking for that new dream home, because emotionally they feel guilty abandoning their “old friend” which has been a part of their family for so long.  Dr. Scott Peck refers to this phenomenon as “cathecting”, concentrating emotional energy on a material object or an idea. Others would define this as personifying an object.

            It’s the Realtor’s job to bring them back down softly to earth and educate them about the big picture, the current state of the market, and focus on the correct linear progression down their “to do” list. This can be difficult. Everyone is different, but I try to coach each person about turning their home into a house for sale if I hear that emotional angst. To do that, they have to take that rational leap over the emotional wall. They have to desensitize and remind themselves that once they make that decision to sell, the house is no longer theirs. As a parent coach, I use a lot of questions to get people into transitional thinking. I can use the same technique as a Realtor. What will the new owners enjoy about your house?    What features do you think buyers will appreciate?  A properly done Comparative Market Analysis will also help with the process of transition. If the sellers really have an emotionally overinflated valuation of their home, sometimes it might help to physically show them their competition. Ask them questions about similarities and differences with their home and the others listed on your analysis.
             Once the home is listed, the actual selling process also helps firm up the idea that it’s no longer their home. Agent showings, open houses, the sign in the yard, all of those physical symbols and activities help sellers to emotionally move on. They will always have their memories. When appropriate, I would encourage people to write the new owners a welcome letter. In it, they can include a memory or two and also offer some helpful hints about the house’s unique quirks, such as watching out for the little tree frogs who like to sleep in garden hose hangers.
           
 
 
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mybrokerdiana

mybrokerdiana  Diana Peterson is a licensed Oregon Broker with Prudential Real Estate Professionals in Roseburg, Oregon.  Douglas County living is the best kept secret in Oregon. Read More

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