1st PR Web Release

[metaylor9]

First of all I would like to say I have lurking in the background absorbing as much information as possible and these forums have SOOOO helpful. I feel like I am starting to get a feel for all of this. Thanks to all who contribute.

That being said, I am going to write my first article in the form a PRweb Press Release and was wondering if any of you had the time to review it before I posted it and tell me if I am on the right track or not. I have it written but want to post it here because it is kind of long for a post (480 words). I don't know the etiquette regarding this.

Let me know if any of you can help. Thanks.

[BrandonSternfield]

You can post it here. Or host it somewhere hidden, and link to it. Your choice.

Just keep in mind, if you post it here, people might not read it

[metaylor9]

OK, thanks. I have posted it here:

http://www.indyrebaterealestate.com/...onTownship.php

[BrandonSternfield]

It's well written, grammatically correct, and has correct spelling.

A note though :"they perform all the tasks a traditional broker would."

You say that a few times. I'd take that out. It makes it sound like you aren't qualified to do what a 'traditional broker' does.

Maybe put a spin on it. Say that you're just like any other traditional broker, only you've gone the extra step in customer satisfaction. It means the same thing, only it has a positive connotation to it, as opposed to the negative denotation your version had.

Otherwise, it's nice

[metaylor9]

Great, thanks for the advice. I will definately change that. Do you think it is OK to have 4 links to my site with in the article or is that too many?

[BrandonSternfield]

I'd make either Carmel or Fishers be a link. No need to link two suburbs

But the main site, the MLS, and one more link is good I think. Not to much, and each link it to a site where people will want to go.

[ericbramlett]

I think it sounds good - definitely written well. I agree w/ Brandon that you should take some kind of spin on it. Remember - the whole point of press releases is to link bait. A common theme among the full service discounters is "due to advances in technology we're able to offer the same services at a fraction of the price." Think about your audience - tech savvy people - I think they would definitely appreciate that take on it.

Just my opinion. You have a great article, but PRWeb is expensive, so it always pays to revise!

[metaylor9]

Thanks for all the great feedback, I have revised it and it should go out today.

[RyanR]

Hi Metaylor9, did you send it out? If so, how many views have you got so far?

[metaylor9]

1. Release was Read 210 93.3%
2. PDF Download 7 3.1%
3. Printer Friendly Version 4 1.8%
4. eBook Download 4 1.8%

This doesn't seem that great, is it?